Welcome to a gynocentric social system.
Gynocentric means taking a feminine or female perspective. And we are in it. The nightmare is real for me specially. When anything I say is taken as aggressive and dominating. When there is constant gossip and the men keep outpacing the women in show of emotionality. When men are easily dismissed by calling them demanding. Feminine-men partake in this emasculation too by the way.
Fem-men talk about things that they don’t have any control of. Making morally charged statements that they have no authority of. A rabbit hole of empty talks. Predicting themselves without outcome. Unconsciously conditioning the self, society and ourselves. Embracing the same patterns sublimely. Cultivating a weak system. Nobody is defining what matters or who leads. All parties are either trying to pacify or aggressively react. Like a pendulum of emotionality swinging back and forth. Simply taking information, reacting and then discarding it. Or taking it in a rigid temporary fashion at best.
A patriarchal system or the divine system. Is where men lead in the shadow of God, and are not wasting their energy on trivialities. There are no emotional pendulum swings. The effort is towards building consistency and strength. Bravery is rewarded and encouraged. Risk is managed, and a high tolerance of it is revered.
The frame is the unspoken assertion of an experienced outcome. The alpha is simply the one who bears the scars of this outcome. Usually, a masculine frame is always present and there is clear awareness between men who the frame-holder is, in any given scenario. The alpha.
The priority is always the whole or collective, and not for the individual. Emotional states are confided between men, and are always managed. Higher ambition is discussed not debated. Emotional reactions are calculated, and never reactive. Words are weighted and used. The conversation concludes when there is a decision, not when everyone feels heard.
Otherwise we end up where we are. Rubbing in circles. The feminine is designed for this. The feminine is conditioned within the masculine frame and not the other way around. A secure concentration of emotion so her focus is inward and contained. Biologically for the offspring to gather resources for her and her child. The masculine is not circular. It is linear and forward. It moves forward. The risks. The sacrifices. The man ultimately seeks martyrdom. Death for a noble cause.
Martyrdom here isn’t a death wish. It’s the orientation of a man who holds something above his own comfort.
The fem-man is the inversion of this. He is not moving towards a noble cause. He is retreating into softness as a cause. The martyrdom is replaced by “things”. The sacrifice is replaced by the performative. And everyone applauds him for it.
The man’s primal desire compared with the female, differs. And the man has an outward nature of seeking greatness. To sacrifice himself for the family, or something greater than himself, this idea of greatness motivates and drives a man. Whereas the feminine motivation comes from protecting the child, it is playing safe. It’s not extreme, it is psychology. The culture has pathologised this. Called it ego. And toxic. But a man without a cause is not humble. He is hollow.
Talking too much is not a virtue. It is weakness. You are giving away everything. And we seem to think by giving away all our power, the confidence we earn is its own form of power. But I’d argue this is the super-feminine. Like when women gossip.
The masculine cannot thrive in open gossip. This is the best strategy for the wife. To win her husband over. In a scenario for a high level of trust. Over-communication becomes the ultimate form of submission. And a genuine man accepts this submission and in turn complies with the wife. Indirectly the ultimate circle of power dynamics is formed.
Apart from the wife and husband, any other relation is open to corruption because of the smallest crack. I imagine this can be replicated between brother and sister too. Or brother and brother. Provided both parties hold high level of trust, loyalty and integrity. But I wouldn’t rely on it. It is too delicate. And especially open to outside influence.
The virus spreads through comfort. Through the slow substitution of strength for softness, of purpose for performance. The cure is not anger. It is not reaction. It is a return to the frame, to the cause, to being a man.